Washington, Mar 10: American actress Drew Barrymore has revealed that she loved performing her miserable act in her new TV movie Grey Gardens.

Barrymore, 34, further revealed that she is not always the happy-go-lucky person she portrays in most movies and chat shows, and that playing the role of Little Edie Beale gave her the chance to vent out her depression.

“I was excited to bring my own pain to something. I mean, contrary to my happy-go-luckiness, I have so much darkness in there,” Contactmusic quoted her as telling W magazine.

“Playing Edie, I felt like s**t. I thought, ‘I’m afraid beyond anything I’ve ever known. I’m miserable; I’m scared; I feel sick all the time.’

“And I was like, ‘Good! At least I have somewhere to put it...’ I’m not f**kin’ happy all the time. I like making people feel good, but it was great not to have to please anybody,” she stated.

Barrymore admits that preparing for the film, which co-stars Jessica Lange and Jeanne Tripplehorn, reminded her of a stint in rehab when she was a teenager.

She became so immersed in the character of real-life recluse Beale, she locked herself away for six months, and turned her back on friends, newspapers and technology.

The character she plays is of former U. S. First Lady Jackie Kennedy Onassis'' odd cousin, who lived with her mother in a sprawling, rundown New York mansion. (ANI)